What a cracking letter that was sent recently to Flybe. Just imagine how much more irate/stronger it would be if this guy had flown with Ryanair!

Flybe Customer Relations
The New Walker Hangar
Exeter International Airport
EX5 2HL
United Kingdom

To Whom It May Concern:
(I would normally write Dear Sirs, but you don’t deserve it)

I write to express my extreme dismay at the level of service (or lack thereof) which you provide to your customers. I can honestly say that I have become so angry and frustrated with your prices, your dishonesty, your ridiculous policies and the attitude of your staff that even as a last resort I will now refuse to travel with you and I frequently tell all my friends, family and colleagues to do the same.

When you offer a “free flight” as a reward for having a Flybe credit card, why do the baggage charges suddenly become £13 (each way!) when they are normally £7.99? So the fare of the flight is “free” but among your many hidden charges you recoup £26 of that money by increasing the fees on baggage. You probably call this clever business, but I’m no genius and you didn’t fool me, so it’s not clever at all, it’s deceiving.

Why do you charge £8 to book with a credit card? Especially when it’s a Flybe card!?! No company charges this much when using a credit card online, in fact most companies don’t charge at all, so this is clearly another aspect of the booking process where you steal from your customers. After all, if (in the midst of a recession) people could afford to put your over-priced flights on a debit or cash card, then they wouldn’t be using a credit card, right? So why not make things even more difficult for them, yes that kind of behaviour just has Flybe written all over it.

Why do you charge £60 to change the name on a ticket? Seriously this so-called “administration fee” is an absolute disgrace. It is a simple task which takes about a minute to complete over the phone, and you charge £60 for it. Sixty pounds. Some people don’t earn that in a whole day. Are your staff so uniquely intelligent and highly trained that a minute of their time is worth this much?! You should be thoroughly ashamed of yourselves.

I could continue all day with reasons to loathe your company but frankly I have wasted enough of my time on you already. I hope this letter makes it all the way to your boardroom, and if it does, then especially for you self-important suits who are far too busy to hear the whole letter, then here is a fitting summary for you:

If the earth was about to explode and the only way to escape the blast was to climb aboard a Flybe space shuttle (assuming of course it wasn’t delayed or cancelled) then I would rather say goodbye cruel world, because although I may lack the mental capacity of your £60-a-minute telephone staff, if you think I’m paying £26 baggage, £45 taxes, £8 for using my Flybe credit card and over £1 for a tiny can of orange juice on board a flight which is supposed to be “free” then you can f**k right off.

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